In the USA, the month of May is recognized as Mental Health Awareness Month–the purpose of this is to educate the public about mental health conditions and promote strategies for achieving mental health & wellness. I choose to talk about mental health in relation to my experience in order to fight the stigma toward mental health conditions and open the door for conversations that can help all individuals benefit mentally & emotionally in their own lives.

Therapy is often viewed with a critical lens in the context of medical treatment. In the traditional sense of professional counseling, individuals often prefer exploring a less ‘clinical’ method of addressing their emotional needs; for example, the practice of jiu jitsu as a positive habit for both physical exercise and stress management.

While grappling has had a significant impact on my emotional well-being; it has not always been to my advantage. In fact, at several points in my jiu jitsu journey I have contemplated quitting altogether because it became a source of frustration, anxiety, and self-doubt. Over the past year I have been able to reevaluate my relationship with the sport with the deliberate intention of addressing my mindset. Looking inward, I discovered that I was relying on jiu jitsu to automatically heal me. The reality is that I learned I could use jiu jitsu as a tool in my arsenal to cope with emotional challenges.

Therapy is Designed to be Challenging

When we address physical injuries, we are prescribed a set of exercises to rehabilitate the parts of our body that have been impacted. A physical therapy session can be immensely difficult because you must work for the reward–and it may be weeks, months before you are capable of moving the way you need to in order to perform. We have to slowly adjust our body to using those weaker still-healing parts.  Similarly, as healthy athletes in jiu jitsu, each day we expose ourselves to a physical practice that we are unfamiliar with–and we often come out of these sessions exhausted from pushing our body to its limits.

From training, we passively gain incredible benefits–just by showing up. The physical exertion pumps more oxygen to the brain, allowing us to produce more of those happy-building hormones (for lack of a more… scientific analysis). The physical benefits can translate into increased energy, better sleep, sharper focus; all of which are intimately connected with our mental state.

However, what we may not recognize is that maximizing our results from using jiu jitsu as a mental therapy requires extra work. We have to access uncomfortable and foreign mental pathways in order to train our brains to cope with stress. You can actually complete a grueling jiu jitsu practice without addressing new mental challenges–because you must actively choose to engage in the psychological component of the art.

Vulnerability in Jiu Jitsu

What does it mean to address mental challenges during training? For starters; our coaches and teammates cannot force us outside our comfort zone. If I don’t want to spar, I don’t have to. If I feel like only going for armbars because they’re my best submission, I can keep going for armbars until the timer runs out.

It requires a deliberate initiative on our part to address the fears and challenges we wish to overcome. Competing. Training with new partners. Belt testing. Rolling with a more skilled teammate. It requires vulnerability to continue our growth. This is the part that can be terrifying.

For those who have experienced trauma in our past, jiu jitsu can be a form of exposure therapy that is deeply stressful from day one on the mats. Taking that first step to practicing physical closeness with a training partner is more than some people can handle–but by repeating that process day after day, it can completely transform that experience. It can reframe physical touch–what was once a source of deep discomfort–into something familiar, safe, and the best part… even fun.

Signing up for a combat sport & knowing what we’re getting ourselves into means that many students have no problem getting up-close and personal with their new training partners. Those individuals will have to practice vulnerability in an entirely different way. For the lifelong athlete who has excelled in other sports, learning jiu jitsu may be the first time they’ve encountered failure in an athletic setting. If that student can accept those humbling moments and move forward into problem-solving; they will reap the benefit of developing themselves as martial artists–as well as becoming more confident in the face of failure in other aspects of their lives.

Showing weakness, particularly in a combat sport, can be potentially humiliating for students with a high-achieving and competitive mindset. And these opportunities for failure appear at every single level of learning jiu jitsu; from day one to black belt. I actually noticed that while I was not very disappointed in my shortcomings as a beginning student, it was because I expected myself to be pretty clueless–basically doing anything right at practice was a personal win! Then, adding on mat time, getting more invested in the sport, beginning to compete, and eventually earning my blue belt, I only saw myself getting more and more upset with myself for making mistakes. I plateaued in my progress. I wanted to do whatever it took to win, and when I got submitted in practice and completely bungled new techniques, those failures chipped away at my self-esteem.

Growth Requires Discomfort

Lately, I have shifted my attitude toward keeping a growth mindset and embracing the unknown. It turns out that when I alleviated the pressure of success, I not only explored my greatest weaknesses in my technique… but I was able to give focused energy into those areas without fear or shame. As an example, if you have trained with me lately, you probably know what types of guard styles I prefer and sweeps I tend to go for during a round. Of course, this goes really well for me when I can trap my opponent into playing to my style; not so well when they have an effective counter. 

So I gave myself some new rules. No more of my favorite guard games. Try inverting. If I have an armbar locked up, go for a different submission. Stop playing with my favorite tools, try the new ones I kinda suck at. I ended up struggling against partners I can typically keep up with. I found myself submitted more. I certainly wasn’t dominating the mats. But did I lose anything? Not really. I got to develop a new skill set. I’m continuing to develop those techniques that I was ignoring in favor of the sweeps I’ve drilled hundreds of times. 

The new stuff is becoming more familiar. I’m not as scared of trying something new. And more importantly, I am having a lot more fun because when I improve a new skill, that makes every single training session a success. And the sport that I sought out for its holistic benefits to the mind and body is no longer a place where I feel hopeless.

Exercising our mindset looks different for each individual, and looks different throughout each stage in life. Someone who fears public speaking can face this fear by beginning to coach during practices. A student that wants to develop their confidence can begin by entering their first competition. As once-challenging circumstances become effortless, new paths of resistance can be sought out.

Final Guidance

Jiu jitsu can be a safe outlet for us to practice coping skills that we can leverage in our daily lives. The worst consequence we can face on the mats is a submission. Preparing for these grappling challenges allows us to face problems off-the-mat with grace and confidence. However, to activate this mental and emotional element of training, we must expose our weaknesses so we can invest in their growth. With this focus on strengthening our most vulnerable qualities, we develop resilience in the face of new obstacles… whether it’s an unexpected life event, or a tight armbar.